Procrastination! This topic was recently brought to me by one of my colleagues. And I have been bringing it to my life myself for as long as I remember 😉
We’ve all been there, haven’t we?
If you’re reading me for the first time – my name is Anna, I am a social psychologist and a RTT practitioner. RTT stands for Rapid Transformational Therapy and it’s a hybrid therapy modality that gives fast results in many areas of human existence: from physical illnesses to life purpose and goals, phobias, infertility, addictions, depression and anxiety, career, money… you name it. In my professional life I have worked with hundreds of successful women who feel like they’re stuck, like they’re reached their glass ceilings, or who are on their way to discover their life mission or their soul desires. And my mission is to help women thrive and live up to their full potential, because – let’s face it – the world needs wise, mature leadership now more than ever. I am passionate about gender equality and building inclusive, compassionate communities and I truly believe that female leaders who have dug through their own dramas and bullshit are the real hope for our planet. This is why I created Female Leadership Society, as a group and platform for us to grow together.
So, now – let’s go back to PROCRASTINATION.
There’s this common belief that in order to be successful (or just BE to be honest!) we need to have everything under control. And I mean EVERYTHING.
The way we look. The way we feel. Our homes. Our works. Our social life. Our future. Our neighbourhood. Our bodies. Our health. Our fun and adventurous free time. Our families. Omg. Just naming all these (and I’m sure there’s more, really!) gave me a headache!
So we get up in the morning with this never ending to do lists. Every single day. And we do our best to cross as much as we can off the list. One by one, like it’s some kind of game level we need to pass to get to the next one. And once we do (which we almost never do completely, because let’s face it, there’s just too much of it), another level looks exactly the same or worse in many cases.
And on the every day to do list there are always things we look forward to more than to others, which is absolutely normal, so we usually tend to do them first, and the things that are left are usually the worst, am I right? Who’s been there? I have, I still am most of the time.
The thing with our daily to do lists is that they are more often than not missions impossible to accomplish and we are inteligent people, right? We know that 😀 But we fall into this trap anyways. Every single time!
I’m not going to give you a quick fix to that… as there is no quick fix to that. I won’t give you any advice, even though there’s one that I have found very helpful and do my best to use it as much as I can, and it is: Do what you hate first. Makes sense, right? You then are left only with better things to do. It makes sense on so many levels, but mainly it gives you this sense of accomplishment that’s so crucial to be able to to go through the rest of your list.
But of course this is the advice for those of us who choose to stick to their long, never ending to do lists.
There’s also another fix that I find extremely helpful and, especially recently, it keeps me going.
I call it embracing my inner procrastinator.
I look at it as this 2 years old inside of me that just doesn’t want to do this shit. She wants to play, she wants to be loved, nurtured and cuddled. She wants to be seen and recognised. She’s there for a reason.
So for a while now, whenever I get on a streak of procrastination (it does happen to me so often, I am not going to pretend it doesn’t and if you’re one of the people that know how to handle it, KUDOS to you my friends!), I try to see this 2 years old in me and ask her what’s the problem.
She may be tired. She may be bored. She may feel not seen. And all the negative emotions I experience when I know there’s so much to do and I just can’t bring myself to get it done are the emotions of my inner neglected two years old who says “No no no. It’s too much”.
And you know what? It usually IS too much!
Does this mean that this child inside me prevents me from doing things? No. She just makes me take the time to look at all my chore list from her perspective.
What are the things essential for my survival? What are the things essential for survival of my close ones? What are the most important things when it comes to what I really want and need?
And usually it turns out that… these things aren’t even on the list because I buried them deep below everyday tasks that “have to be done”.
But to be honest, not that much in our lives really has to be done right now! And yet we tend to dilute our power, our possibilities, our potential in stuff that drains us and doesn’t lead us any closer to what we really want to do.
I believe leadership is less about pushing at all costs and more about being in tune with who we really are and what’s needed at the moment. Less about fighting every single obstacle that comes our way and more about finding ways around them. And finally less about managing every single aspect of reality and more about focusing on what’s really important and creating.
This is why we’re here, right? To create something new. To start a revolution. To change the world to be a better place.
So yeah, ladies and gentlemen. Embrace your inner procrastinator. Look at it as you would be looking at your own 2 years old self. And go from there. See where it leads you. What if it leads you to places that are more rewarding, more encouraging, places that give you more energy and drive?
As always, let me know what you think of this and if it resonates with you in any way. And if it does and you’re ready to dig deeper to find out what it is that will make you want to get out of bed faster in the morning, let me know. I’m here. And I will be more than happy to assist you in your journey.